16 March 2006

ides + full moon + east village = lots of random nudity

and good chinese food.

woozy and i had dinner in a chinese time warp on 2 ave last night. Jade Mountain. it's somewhere around 7th street or so, i can't quite remember. but everything is less than $7, except the lobster, which the only other patron of the restaurant ordered. everything comes with soup and dessert! and here is the first and only place i've found in new york that will make me some DEEP FRIED DUMPLINGS!!!! seriously, this place is a gem. and the woman who runs it is one sassy chinawoman. have dinner there tonight!

over the course of dinner, woozy asked if i'd seen avenue q. i told her it was funny she said that because i'd just seen it sunday, and i thought it was hilarious. aside from the boning puppets. that was slightly unnerving. but we did agree on the amazing number that was "i wish i could go back to college". we were especially impressed with the part where you realize, yes it would be fucking awesome to go back to college, only you're way too old to be in college and you'd be the creepy older dude at college. life's a bitch.

our stroll from the restaurant to the F was a threefold adventure. first we saw them shooting a movie apparenlty called "empty city". oh, look at that, it's an adam sandler movie about september 11th. did i miss the part where we entered an alternate universe? this is a man who, brilliantly, had shampoo and conditioner argue with each other. anyway, we saw don cheadle in the road shooting a scene. woo hoo.

nextly, we were around st. mark's maybe when a guy came up to us and started saying "yeah, real good shit, right? good shit?" and presenting a magazine to us. the magazine, of course, was full of boobs. i'll admit i didn't spend a whole lot of time studying it, but it sort of looked like, dare i say, a collage of boobs. it was really odd. it was kind of like "in touch" only instead of celebrities, there were lots of pictures of boobs. he then got into my very personal space, like up against me, which i don't particularly go for. this prompted me to say, "ok, you can go away now". he seemed to think it was funny that he'd gotten a reaction from me and walked away chuckling. bleh.

finally, as we were walking past dempsey's pub, i noticed the smoking patrons all had their eyes directed towards something high across the street. of course, as one does, i searched for whatever it was they were looking at. and there, on the top floor of the building directly across the street, was a woman doing something i really can't describe. she was climbing up on something but i have no idea what, from the angle it looked like it could've been a refridgerator or a wall that didn't reach fully to the ceiling. whatever it was she was doing, she was doing it butt-ass naked and directly in front of an equally naked window. of course, we were all mezmerized by this strange woman doing this strange thing naked at 915 at night. no one could figure out what it was she was climbing on, let alone why she was doing it, and certainly not why she was doing it totally nakedly. the fun came crashing to a halt when, due to the increased volume of we the spectators, she looked in our direction and was immediately photographed by someone standing behind me. this solidified her mortified suspicion that yes, about 20 people were all hollering at her from across the street because she was climbing all over something random and was doing so bare-assed. she disappeared from view shortly thereafter.

i consider myself extremely lucky that the only thing even remotely strange on the subway ride home was a sleeping homeless woman who had a jansport backpack on top of her big red cart full of what i can only assume were all her worldy possessions, onto which she'd somehow written "anti-social" in white-out.

UPDATE: this just in from woozy
on my subway ride home, a band of rowdy firemen in kilts disrupted the trip.

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