30 September 2005

just when you thought we'd make it through without one

bomb in iraq!

i just remembered this

while coming home in a taxi the other night around 3 am, in a, shall we say, depleted mental state: i ashed into my own ear. well, that sounds worse than it is. i ashed out the window and the whole solid chunk flew right back into my ear. i then spent the next 10 minutes laughing and saying "i just ashed in my fucking ear. what the fuck?"

watch people freak out

about friendster's stalker bust.

subway, your way, right away. (and by "right away" we mean "sometimes if you're lucky")

remember that jingle?


F train--skips smith/9th, carroll & bergen manhattan bound
express from Jay to Church ave (skips carroll, berge, smith/9th and 4th ave)
G train--no service btw. hoyt/scher. and smith/9th.
basically, you are not getting into or out of carroll gardens this weekend.
N train--stops at dekalb
R train--brooklyn bound go over the bridge


do you get to the movies early to watch previews?

go watch this now!!

the shining as a feel good movie, replete with "solsbury hill" in the trailer.

and then go here and see west side story as a horror flick.

(who else but waxy?)

just a picture of london

hi london!

some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator

afghanistan has a mall (whew, looks like they're gonna be OK then). but no one wants to get on the escalator.

It is nice to shop here. The markets outside are dusty," said shop owner Abdul Kasim.

"That is real development. I wish Afghanistan were full of shopping malls," said customer Abdul Fatah, who had just purchased a silver wristwatch.

I'm pretty sure Abdul has nothing to worry about.

but wait, they're pretty clever over there...

Habib Safi plans to erect two skyscrapers with an incorporated shopping mall in the western Afghan town of Herat. In his office hang blueprints for the structures, which are to be called the Twin Towers.Christening the Herat towers after their New York counterparts, whose destruction was plotted by Osama bin Laden in Afghanistan, is not at all tasteless, argues one of Safi's employees."The difference is that our towers won't collapse," he smirks.

gorillas are using tools, humans doomed

for the first time outside of captivity, gorillas are using tools, hinting that they will soon be taking over the world.

what the hell is wrong with people?

someone booted their jack russell terrier, but first he or she wrote "free" on it in black magic marker.

equally hilarious and depressing. unfortunately, no picture...

...brown and white Jack Russell terrier found wandering around town with the word "FREE" written on his side in black letters.

that poor, poor dog.

update! dog and owner reunited...apparently the owner was not the one who wrote "free" on his dog.

this is by no means the funniest part of this article

His now ex-girlfriend told The Sun that Mr. Carroll believed that "the trees in his front garden are actually people disguised as trees," and spent his nights prowling around the house looking for intruders. "I'll tell him, 'Come back to bed, you stupid twit,' " she told the newspaper.

i can't even...just read the damn thing.

He has been issued with two antisocial behavior orders in two local jurisdictions forbidding him to threaten, harass or intimidate anyone in a 400-mile radius. He has been told by local government authorities to stop throwing raucous late-night parties and to stop holding demolition derbies on his land.

400 miles. he has to travel 400 miles to threaten, harass or intimidate someone. they're trying to get him into scotland.

just remember we're on drugs

a funny (at least the beginning part where they quote chris rock) review of Greg Critser's book, Generation RX, in which he talks about how we're popping pills in our generally excessive way.

What Mr. Critser has done in these pages is synthesize a lot of information and reserve it to the reader in an accessible, easily digested form - much as he did with information about obesity in his 2003 book, "Fat Land."

holy sars discovery, batman!

In Asia, many people eat bats or use bat feces in traditional medicine for asthma, kidney ailments and general malaise.
yes, whenever i get general malaise, i run for the batshit, snaps me right out of it.

sing some protest song

an article in the new republic talks about how protests are too scattered. no one is content merely protesting the war.

Roger Yates, a demonstrator from Martinsburg, West Virginia, becomes so frustrated with the protest's incoherence that he grabs a bullhorn, jumps on a newspaper vending machine, and beseeches the marchers to remember why they came in the first place. "One thousand different causes won't hurt Bush," he yells. "If we don't focus on Iraq, it'll be like we were never here!"

29 September 2005


last night i went to joemca & poets at pianos. then, for the first time in over a year, i went to welcome to the johnson's. this outing led me to discover a few things:

a. the downstairs space at piano's smells like a locker room
b. given the opportunity, i will sit through a show
c. the johnson's is very, very loud.
d. the johnson's seems to be filling up with people who look far too clean to be in there

as the turnstile locks up and punches you in the stomach

because the mta isn't happy just being shitty, they have to add a few complications along the way. today, it's new software that makes the metrocard readers more "sensitive". if this is anything like the new software i just put on my ipod that makes it cycle through entire albums in 2 seconds without playing a note and then freeze, i couldn't be more excited.

apparently, they're trying to clamp down on fare evader types and people with fake metrocards? i don't even know. whatever it's for, rest assured it will bother we, the fare-paying, mta-hating public.

and now, some quotes from the story:

The Transit Authority has installed the software systemwide to prevent underground thieves who take spent MetroCards and bend them in the right spots to get an extra trip per card - which they then sell.

The TA has estimated that MetroCard fraud costs the authority $16 million annually.

look, man, i'm having a real fucking hard time swallowing the idea that there is $16 million worth of fare evasion every year. i mean really. SIXTEEN MILLION. that's a whooooole lot of money. a year. i am calling someone out. you are lying!!

they say that people are somehow missing the last fares on their cards, in which case the dude(ess) behind the token booth is supposed to buzz them through. this makes me wonder, why not just commit fraud that way? also, this reminds me of a story of a friend.

there is a silly thing that happens in brooklyn sometimes when you can't go into manhattan from the carroll & bergen street stops. my friend was attempting to do this, but knowing there weren't any manhattan bound trains, she went on to the coney island bound platform to get to 7th ave, where she could switch to the manhattan bound F.

so she's standing there waiting for a train and two or three manhattan bound trains roll through--and stop--at bergen street. at this point she realizes that perhaps she can just go to manhattan like normal people, but bergen street is one of those stations that doesn't give people the opportunity to cross back & forth between the two tracks, you go in one way, you're stuck there. so she's forced to walk out of the train station and cross the street and go back down, where her metrocard will not register because it's an unlimited and she just swiped it on the other side of the track. luckily (or so she thought), she was now in the entrance with the dude in the box. she explains to the guy what's happened and he refuses to let her through. she has to watch another train go by whilst waiting for the 16 minutes or whatever it is to elapse before she can swipe her card. this is bullshit.

on the flip side, i was in bergen street station once, late at night, drunk, when i decided to be a fucking retard. i don't know why we hadn't just gone straight through the turstiles, or maybe we'd--yes, that's what happened. we'd gone down the wrong side and were waiting for our cards to be useable again. anyway, they have those little things that say "please dispose your metrocard here" or something to that effect, and i was all "i'm cool", so i said to my friend "here, watch me tempt fate" and i stuck my card in and out a couple of times. it was so stupid on so many levels, but i was drunk and that's a reasonable excuse for just about any behavior. anyway, what i didn't realize was that i wasn't tempting fate in any way, i was de-magnifying my metrocard. my week-old 30-day metrocard. at 2 am.

jews find old shit in israel

actually, this is pretty interesting. some dudes uncovered a seal from the first temple (that's a wicked long time ago--like 2500 years)

and in slightly older and more random religious news, a holy cow statue was found in iran, suggesting ancient iranians (mesopotamians?) liked kobe steaks.

(merci, fark)

i walk the (chorus) line

guess who's life story is becoming a broadway musical? the man in black. he's mourning the murder of his own diginity.

and fall has officially begun

Pumpkin spice ale.

(via fark)

and the hometown version.

bomb du jour

The deaths brought to 1,934 the number of U.S. troops who have died since the Iraq war started in 2003, according to an Associated Press count.

that's just my baby daddy

somewhere along the way, i started sleeping with the radio on. i'm not entirely sure why, most of the time i turn it so low i can barely hear it anyway. but there are the times when i'll wake up and npr's playing "Lakme" and i listen to it in the silence and seclusion of the night. but most of the time i just turn it up when the first excruciating notes ring out from my alarm clock and listen to the news whilst debating whether or not to take the day off.

This morning was different, though. First I dealt with those few milliseconds of confusion. One by one I realized: my head is very heavy and in pain, my lungs hurt, my eyes will not open. Then the conclusion: “I appear to be hungover”. And a resolution: “I will be late for work” and I slammed the snooze button. After three unsuccessful attempts to will myself out of bed, I tried to slowly ease myself into consciousness with the soothing voices of npr’s newspeople. But then I heard about

Before I get any further into this, I’m sending out a call for assistance:

"There was never a ring, and after 1,000 proposals, it doesn't really mean anything," says White, who never felt pressure to marry, since her unwed parents have been together 22 years. "It was getting old. I was becoming a statistic, shacking up out of wedlock. And I didn't know if we were going downhill."
The woman who spoke the above words, whose parents have been together for 22 years, is 28. Anyone?

So anyway, I’m listening to this story (which, for whatever reason, is not on the npr or wnyc websites and which the post and ny1 and –duh– the times have ignored!) and I’m half asleep and all I’m hearing is “blacks don’t marry” “high percentage of out-of-wedlock children” the phrase “baby daddy” used in total seriousness and that this novelist thinks it’s her job to make people marry each other.

It's time to marry your baby daddy, says one Brooklyn woman. So she's helping 10 couples get hitched.

Who the fuck is she? I don’t care if people marry their “baby daddies”. If you’re going to do someone a favor, like give them a free wedding, don’t make it some moral soapbox so you can run around telling unwed couples with children (black ones only, it seems) that they need to get married. It’s none of your business.

The argument is that there is a very high rate of unmarried families in the black community and that there are too many children born to “baby momma/daddy” situations. While these things may be true, making a whole bunch of people get married is not going to make one damn bit of difference. You’re just married. That’s it. You can be married to someone and still not really give a shit about that person or the relationship. You can not be married to someone and be fully committed to and caring for your partner.

Basically, I think it’s really fucking irritating when people run around saying they need to save their communities by making them do stupid shit like getting married. How about some education? And family planning and birth control? Don’t go doing people favors to further your own social agenda.

I am a tad cranky this morning. afternoon. but come on, Marry Your Baby Daddy?

i do not look like a fisher price man!

seriously, what the hell is this guy made of? every time i see a picture of him it makes me laugh. i hope someone puts him in madame tussaud's someday.

28 September 2005

watching a movie in your mind

brooklyn vegan has pictures from last saturday's walking concert show at sin-e. you might have missed it when i very briefly referred to it as "the show i went to after john vanderslice blew my mind". anyway, they're fun kids. i was sad that BV didn't have more insight into the argument the lead singer had with his (presumed) gf mid-show. he did have the class to follow the tif with "audrey".

luque(e)r street madness

i'll be damned if i can remember who, but i think some friends of mine were discussing this street in brooklyn at some point recently enough that when i was meandering through forgotten ny and saw this dissertation on it, it rang a few bells. anyway, it's an interesting story, and forgotten ny is a great place to spend, oh, 2 hours or so after lunch. my eyes hurt.

what else can you do with this

but link to it...

i think this might actually be nauseatingly cute. (via cityrag)

it's not just me

Now the only real question is what does more damage when thrown at Kirsten Dunst: rocks or bottles? Experts would say it's rocks. At least I hope they would, cause that's what I'm using.


time out is 10!

so i got my Time Out New York just now, and it's all "we're ten". not only that, but they've included a "souvenir poster", with all the covers from the beginning of TONY time on it. ask yourself, what would you do if you walked into someone's apartment (assuming they do/did not work for TONY) and saw this poster, framed in their living room?

once you tear off the rubbish, Parker Posey reveals herself as the cover girl. everyone loves parker posey.

there's a great story about one of the MacArthur "geniuses" getting her award:

at first i thought they were calling me to recommend somebody, but when he said, "are you sitting down?" that's when i started to think, okay, maybe...and he made a point of making sure i was in a really private, quiet place. i closed the door to my office -- thank god i have an office --
she's lucky he wasn't just a pervert making a phone sex call, anyway:
sat back down and he said, "i'm sure you've heard of the macarthur 'genius' awards, and this year you're one of them".
so now we all know what it is like when they call you up to tell you they're gonna give you500k to use however you see fit.
and there's a great list of new york-centric songs and books set in ny.

it's a pretty fun issue. the kind i'd recommend you go to a barnes & noble and read there, then put it back and go along your merry way.

rings around the world

super furries are coming back to new york! with caribou!

it finally happened

i'm tired of bitching about the MTA, so here's gothamist to do it for me.

lifehacker loves you

i'm not sure if i'll ever actually get around to doing this, but lifehacker has shown me the way. the way to create your own shortcuts to menu items. and it is good.

the go! team

scenestars streams for your pleasure. (rachel)

monty python and the search for numbers

Terry Jones goes searching for the history of numbers...

"We travelled miles to a temple to find the place where the first ever zero had been written on to a wall," he says....

"When we got there it was locked and the gatekeepers were on holiday," he explains.
"Anyway, we managed to get into the right room and looked at this inscription and it was early Hindi writing.
"But without a guide we had no idea what it said or which one was the nought."

science is cool

more pictures of stuff like this:

remember when adam sandler was funny?

yeah, it's tough.

now he wants to jump onboard the ship of fools that keeps turning mediocre tv shows into movies and do a version of gilligan's island. what's next, love, american style?

6 year old suspended for bringing butter knife to school

something similar actually happened to me in high school. but i brought the knife on purpose, so i could cut up an apple. i nearly got suspended but i managed to convince our resource officer that i was really just going to cut up an apple.

anyway, this poor little kid accidentally has a butter knife with him and he's suspended. he's SIX! his mom had this to say, and i agree. and he sounds like a cutie.
"How can my son, who's still learning to tie his shoes, be responsible for a book bag that I shoved him out the door with?" Lynette Gray said.

aww, he's learning to tie his shoes!! let's thow the mother in jail!!

happy birthday kermit

here's a stamp for you!

clearly i'm not very awake yet

here's an article about carbon dioxide that i don't really understand.

and there's no ice left.

when talking down a criminal, try illicit drugs to gain his or her trust

that woman who caught that dude who shot up the courthouse in the ATL apparently calmed him down by reading some self-help book. it turns out, she had a little extra help from...methamphetamines!

But in a memoir released yesterday, Ms. Smith also recounts that she gave the kidnapper some of her supply of crystal methamphetamine during her captivity and that she did not tell the police for some time afterward.

apparently he asked her for pot, She answered no but said she did have some "ice," or crystal meth.

Ms. Smith says that at the time, she was fighting an addiction to crystal methamphetamine that had previously led her to spend time in a psychiatric hospital and to lose custody of her 5-year-old daughter.

"Suddenly, looking down at my drug pouch," she says, "I realized that I would rather have died in my apartment than have done those drugs with Brian Nichols. If the cops were going to bust in here and find me dead, they were not going to find drugs in me when they did the autopsy. I was not going to die tonight and stand before God, having done a bunch of ice up my nose."

drug pouch. ha.

The book's drug revelations were first reported yesterday by The Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

go ajc!!! the only newspaper in atlanta, it's OK though, because it's at a third grade reading level.

have you abused your child today?

these people have.

Ms. Murphy said she decided to lock the children in the basement because a boyfriend moved in with her. "So I put brackets and a lock on the door, which I kept locked," she said.

this is so not even the worst part.

who says women are oppressed in iraq?

today's bomb, executed by a female.

in other news, kabul gets one, too.

27 September 2005

ny to london in 54 minutes?

i'd take that commute!
via londonist

i don't even know if we have these

but londonist recommends what to order at a North African restaurant.

tom cruise kills oprah

watch it here.
(waxy love)

murder-suicide in the slope

good coverage from gothamist...5th ave and 11th.

in case you didn't already feel like having a beer

here's a story about the guy who runs Kingfisher (mmm, Kingfisher) in India.
it's also about class and caste issues in india.

panda porn

ye olde chinese (along with some US dudes) are using satellites to spy on pandas' sexual activities. they're trying to help the pandas not go extinct, so they're gonna watch them do it. there was a story a while back about a panda in, i think, a chinese zoo that watched some "how to" videos and then got super horny. so that seems to work. they'll probably discover that's what the wild pandas are doing, too.

the MTA hates you

it seems as though not only is the MTA on "track" (sorry) to have a near $1 billion surplus (um, i could spend that money in about ten seconds), but they've also bought some concrete railway ties, which makes no sense to me anyway -- where's good old steel when you need it? -- that were supposed to last over 40 years, but will need to be replaced after...eight years. Oh, yes, coming up 32+ years short of their expected life span.
I dare you not to laugh: Mr. Hevesi described the deterioration of the track ties as "a management problem."

So back to that surplus, guess what the MTA wants to do with it. Here's a quiz
A. clean and repair the stations
B. improve service
C. build a deck over the west side rail yards
D. lower the fare
do do do do do do do, do do do do do, dododododo, do do do do do do do, do, dodo, do, do, do, do.

answer: C! hurrah. something that effects no passengers whatsoever. YES!

Hevesi wants to offset the fare increase scheduled for '07, but i really think the money's better spent improving the system over all. get some freaking sponges and scrub off the tiles. fix all those leaks. put in better turnstyles, get those LCD things in quicker....

the post and daily news use puns, too.
"The state Legislature did not raise taxes and fees so the MTA could build a platform," amen.

George W. Bush is a Genius

despite all evidence to the contrary, it appears that GWB might be the smartest man walking the face of the earth. He's decided to call for a reduction of gas consumption and asked Americans to drive less (?!?!?!do people know how to do that?). AND: He also issued a directive for all federal agencies to cut their own energy use and to encourage employees to use public transportation.
Whoa, federal employees on public transportation? Are we sure that's a safe idea?

Don't get too excited, though, W was up to his old tricks moments later, "promising" to continue relaxing environmental and transportation rules in an effort to get more gasoline flowing.

la la la, no one will notice: Mr. Bush's comments, while similar to remarks he made shortly after the disruption from Hurricane Katrina pushed gasoline prices sharply higher, were particularly notable because the administration has long emphasized new production over conservation. It has also opted not to impose higher mileage standards on automakers.

the Times does the best to rile its readers by including quotes from Evil Dick Cheney and Ari "it's not my fault" Fleischer from 2001: In 2001, Vice President Dick Cheney said, "Conservation may be a sign of personal virtue, but it cannot be the basis of a sound energy policy." Also that year, Ari Fleischer, then Mr. Bush's press secretary, responded to a question about reducing American energy consumption by saying "that's a big no."
"The president believes that it's an American way of life," Mr. Fleischer said.

Uh-0h Spaghetti-oh's
In Washington, two House committees are expected to consider proposals this week that have been blocked in the past by environmental objections. Beyond making it easier to build new refineries, one proposal would allow states to opt out of Congressional bans on coastal oil drilling, and another would allow drilling for oil and gas in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, which has been controversial for years.
Is this sentence even necessary? The oil and gas industry supported the moves.

26 September 2005

fantasy indie rock

Pitchfork has decided to open the year to indie rock fantasy games...looks like too much work to me.

via waxy

watching your own demise on cnn

so apparently JetBlue customers were able to watch TV as they counted their would-be last seconds. i can't imagine being able to watch that without having a seriously massive panic attack, which i'm pretty sure i'd already be having if we were circling around LAX so upon crash landing we'd have less of a chance of exploding.

further, as we were watching this, we flipped on Fox News, who weren't even covering the story because the O'Reilly Factor was on. Bill had Donald Trump on. imagine if that plane had crashed and you were a passenger watching DTV, and the last thing you saw was Bill O'Reilly interviewing Donald Trump.

since i was just there

curbed on coney island

just in time for the holy days

here's a cartoon for kosher.com, which i guess sells kosher food online. it's pretty funny, but make sure you catch the butcher towards the end.
via, shockingly, screenhead

oh, inverted sleep patterns

It’s a funny thing about birthday parties, they always last until at least 4 a.m. I started out Friday at Porch for a friend’s (one of the creators of dodgeball) 29th, and we ended up at Sing Sing on St. Mark’s until well past 4. I think it was around 5:30 when I was in my apartment again. One thing I should say about that, everyone should always sing “Sister Christian”.

I’d promised myself no plans on Saturday to allow for a full recovery as it was my best friend’s birthday party that night, and I wanted to be in top form. I managed to get about five hours of sleep and we had a lovely dinner at
Cafe Charbon - Epicerie, and then went to Brooklyn Social, which is always a good time.

It seemed appropriate that we all order as many of the cocktails as we could, and so we did. I was partial to the Amalfi, and the Italian American was pretty tasty as well, I managed to avoid the Old Fashioned this time, even though they are a favorite of mine when I want to get completely, how you say, shitfaced? The place was packed with another birthday party, but they donated some of their cupcakes to our cause, so that was good. Eventually, there was some good Motown and 20’s and 30’s jazzy stuff and we were wastedly dancing the night away. However, it seemed the management wasn’t so hot on the dancing thing and played Beethoven’s Fifth, which we were hoping was going to turn out to be “
A Fifth of Beethoven” and would thus be the beginning of a string of disco hits.

Alas, it was (as we decided, the two dwindling birthday parties uniting on the dance floor) only a cruel trick by the management to kill our desire to dance. This discussion turned more violent when some of us went out to smoke and became passionately riled about the silliness of both the cabaret law (which I think has been repealed) and peoplewho don’t want you to dance in their bars. “What is this, Footloose? We just want to DANCE!” etc. and so on. This dissolved into a Kevin Bacon discussion to which my only contribution was, “I think he looks like a woman made of plastic”. This did not go over well.

The next day was the Atlantic Antic, which I had to attend. Because I said so. We got out there about 330 and by the time we got to Magnetic Field, the Soul Shakers were just finishing up. They were awesome, go see them. We wandered around, saw Rob Corddry, had amazing codfish cakes and banana pudding and brisket on a roll and just as we were about to pass out from exhaustion, it was time to get on the train for Coney Island.

I’ve always wanted to go to a Cyclones game, but it’s one of those things I keep talking about doing and never actually doing, like going back to the gym or knitting myself a hat. The point being, I’d never been to Keyspan Park before last night. It’s wicked cool. M. Ward played a nice rockin’ set. The Shins were a lot shorter and less fun than previous shows, but I suppose that they were just the opener. They played “gone for good”, “one by one all day”, “when I goosestep”, “girl on the wing”, “know your onion”, “girl inform me”, “kissing the lipless”, at least, and not in that order. The Stripes came on and made a lot of noise for just two people. I personally am not that into them anyway, but they put on a pretty good show. Plus, it was just time for me to go to sleep by the time they got ½ way through their set.

And now, I have no steam left. At all. Tonight I'm gonna start knitting that hat.

grandaddy ep

stream it here.

23 September 2005

warning: angry rant ahead

because of tremble, i had the misfortune of reading this article in the times about strollers. as a sloper, i am confronted with these irritants on a daily basis. i've also noticed that new yorkers are so lazy they'll push their kid around in a stroller until they're 4 or 5 so they don't have to pick them up or make them walk faster.

strollers are a pain in the ass all day long. especially on the subway. i've helped a few people carry those things down the stairs, which is no easy task without assistance, but people with strollers shouldn't travel during rush hour. and if they do, they don't get to park their stroller in font of three seats, effectively annexing a chunck of the subway for their child and glaring at those of us who are glaring at them thinking "look, bitch, i'm tired, move your goddamned stroller" as though they are entitled to the extra space because they have a stroller. you think you need extra space because you have kids? move out of the city, get a house in the suburbs and drive all over the place, then you can sit all the time. i once saw a woman with four kids, she had two twin boys around 6 and a girl of about 4 and a baby in a pretty sizeable carriage. she managed to take up less space than a lot of the other women i see with just the strollered child. she obviously put some thought into which area of the car she might be least in the way of other passengers, and when the doors opened she would move a little to try to get out of peoples' way. plus, she was feeding her kids carrots or grapes or something healthy instead of the normal rubbish kids are generally jamming down their throats. so i say, go that mom! and screw the rest of you!

strollerers also seem to think it's fine for them to stop in the middle of the sidewalk and have conversations with their friends, it's annoying enough when normal people do this, but you take up like twice as much room, dude! most people are considerate enough to move over so a stroller can have a direct path to the ramp onto the sidewalk, how about realizing that some of us have somewhere to BE! happy hour is almost over, get out of the way.

so the times quotes this guy, who is just a total putz:
Mr. Ford, who offers thoughts about parenting on ModernDayDad.com, said that owning a Bugaboo means that he never has to worry if the stroller will be able to handle certain terrain - and it's an eye-pleaser. "I like how it comes in solid colors. It's not some sort of ugly plaid or ducks and bunnies," he said. "I love its industrial design. I love how it's made of metal, how strong it is."

he likes his stroller because it comes in solid colors? i know, plaid is ugly and ducks and bunnies are so passe. i can't get over what a pretentious fuckhead this guy sounds like. but he's beat me to the punch:
"If you've got a problem," Mr. Ford said, "then you've got issues beyond my stroller."

you're right, i've got issues with a lot of shit, but so do you. and so will your child. this jackass spent $700 on a stroller. that money could have gone to about 2 billion better causes. strollers don't need to go off-roading, they're meant for the road!

In July a $600-plus Mountain Buggy Urban Double Stroller helped shield a 7-month-old baby as a Manhattan building collapsed around her, setting off a flurry of posts in parenting chat rooms about the potential value of utility strollers.
that's really awesome that the baby made it out alive, but i'm not sure it's worth spending that kind of money on a stroller on the off chance that a building might collapse around you.

subway shennanigans

the f is on the A from Jay Street to W4.

no g train from smith/9th to Hoyt Schermerhorn

r goes over the bridge

rain, rain go away. and don't come back, ever

Guidry said water was rising about three inches a minute.

rita's rains are running rapildy round roads already ruined.

"I'm sticking it out," said Florida Richardson, who sat on her front porch in Algiers, holding her grandson on her lap. "This house is 85 years old. It's seen a lot of tornadoes and a lot of hurricanes. You can't run from the power of God." Finally!! someone who blames god! i like how she's willing to sacrifice her grandson's life, too. that's sweet. gramma.

friday tunage

screenstars has Ryan Adams' new one streaming, so far, so good. it's annoying, 'cause i really want to hate this guy, but i'm really very fond of his voice.

also, here are podcasts from cmj. courtesy of Yeti Don't Dance.

here we go

Rising water due to Hurricane Rita washes over levee in New Orleans hard-hit 9th Ward, Army Corps of Engineers says
cnn breaking news

oh, for fuck's sake

bus explodes. 20+ people die. trying to evacuate from a fucking hurricane.

but wait, there's more. experts are warning about storm surges. today's understatement: It's a very bad situation for New Orleans.

Here's what the Governor of Louisiana said about people who weren't planning on evacuating: Perhaps they should write their Social Security numbers on their arms in indelible ink.

The delays were long enough for one ice cream seller on I-45 to do a brisk business on the highway, as drivers left their stopped cars to buy refreshments. Cars overheated and broke down and others ran out of gas, worsening the crush.

The question is how many people will be gravely ill and die sitting on the side of the freeway," said State Representative Garnet Coleman, Democrat of Houston. "Dying not from the storm, but from the evacuation."
Mr. Coleman's family had tried to leave the city Thursday at his urging - he is traveling on the West Coast - but they gave up after 12 hours of stalled traffic, without even passing the city's outer ring highway.
"If you can't move outside the city of Houston in 12 hours, then nobody else is getting out," Mr. Coleman said. "This is it. Because even if you tried to leave now, you would not move fast enough to get out of harm's way in advance of the storm."

The situation raised serious worries about how the city would handle something like a terrorist attack, he said. can we worry about one thing at a time please?

At one point, Mr. Adcock said, he called the Texas Department of Transportation for an alternate route, but the woman who answered could not find a map. awesome, no maps. poor mr. adcock. adcock!

Governor Blanco of Louisiana appealed for 30,000 more Army and National Guard troops to respond to Hurricane Rita. Vice Adm. Thad W. Allen, director of the federal response to Hurricane Katrina, said he would forward to request for to the secretary of the Department of Homeland Security, Michael Chertoff. well, isn't that sweet of him. you have to forward a request for the national guard after a state's been hit by a devistating hurricane and another one is on its way? i'm really not sure about that one. i think there should be some sort of "we're fucked, send troops" hotline for situations like this.

22 September 2005

hooray! yipee! and other happiness words

open house new york is oct 8 & 9 this year. here's the list of places to see. whoopee!
it's such an amazing weekend in the city. the only problem is there is so much to see you have to get kind of anal on the planning if you want to get anywhere. i think i only made it through brooklyn the last two years. (via gawker)


once upon a time, a friend and i were very high, and listening to this song. through what could only be a miracle of god, we turned on the tube and "The Saint" (the movie) was just starting. yeah, we were stoned, but it beat the shit out of that "Wizard of Oz"/"Dark Side of the Moon" crap.
i bet it sounds pretty cool with real instruments. i might actually know, but the bastard takes forever to load, as does the mirror.
(via waxy)

Update: perhaps there's less traffic today, but i got to see it. blow ya' mind. it's really fucking good, especially when they do all the crazy drums in "building steam with a grain of salt".

curbed makes me feel sad for wburgers

just the picture of this development makes my stomach turn.

the answer is yes

curbed asked "are all new developments ugly" and i'm going affirmative on this one. every time i walk around the city, with a very few exeptions, i am faced with hideous new buildings that stick out like sore thumbs. most of them are these new dorm-looking apartment/condo buildings popping up in every vacant lot of the slope and some areas of chinatown and the les...none of them have any character, they look more like the shit people i know lived in when i was in school in atlanta than anything in their own neighborhood. new york is better than that. we have old, beautiful, significant architecture, and we deserve new, beautiful, significant architecture, or at least new copies of old, beautiful, significant architecture. just up the road from my apartment, someone has stripped a brownstone of all its brown, added an extra floor, put a weird porch or sunroom thing (i think, it's not done, so i don't really know what it is) with a sliding glass door to it, effectively erasing any part of the original structure that made it beautiful and charismatic. i don't want to see any more sliding doors on to balconies. none! and why are they setting everything back like 8 feet from the sidewalk and putting a little patch of grass in front? why!?!?!?

which borough is safest?

lots of generally violent behavior:

in the

manhattan (the trendy part!)

queens (a rape, but it's ok, because the suspect says she's a hooker)

jersey (although this was a stabbing)

BROOKLYN!! (SI doesn't count)

what a fucking surprise

the mta spends $200 million on a command center and it freaks out almost immediately.
today's hilarious yet frightening understatement: a troubling sign in the Transit Authority's effort to modernize the subways

don't worry, brooklyn's coming to bail yo' ass out
The old command center in Brooklyn spotted the problem, took over, and dispatchers there reestablished radio contact with all train operators in less than one minute.

Seaton said the Rail Control Center - in the works for at least eight years - is behind schedule and will cost about $223 million when completed.


The mass exodus prompted Texas Governor Rick Perry to close the southbound section of Interstate 45 into Houston, opening up all eight lanes of the highway for traffic heading northwards, away from the storm.
Petrol stations are reporting shortages of fuel, and families are emptying supermarkets of non-perishable and long-life foods.

and US space agency Nasa has closed the Johnson Space Centre in Houston.
um, duh?

it's the first day of fall

time for everyone to start arguing about whether it's easier to balance an egg or not.

work sucks

pretend you're somewhere else. farktography contest this week is full of beautiful places that are more exciting than your cube.

a sudden wet thud

Christopher Orr is cranky about the hitchhiker's DVD. sure, it wasn't as good as the book, but it was still one of the better, more imaginitive films i've seen in a while.

big ol' jetairliner

so my roommates and i watched this story unfold last night for about 1 1/2 hours. they kept saying the plane was scheduled to land in 20 mintues or so, but it turns out that "so" means "over an hour from now". either way, it was incredibly dramatic and scary, but the landing was nearly perfect. one slight bounce and both back wheels were down, and then the front wheels came down only to smoke and spark and be basically ground down to the nub as the plane came to a wonderfully breath-releasing stop. it drove me crazy that the doors didn't open immediately and all the passengers didn't come screaming with joy off the plane and dance around, but i'm satisfied anyway.

now you can pee on the street legally

some spaniards are going to design public loos and bus shelters for us. they are so nice.

remake the city's jumbled streetscape by providing aesthetic order to its thousands of bus shelters and newsstands and, perhaps most intriguing, installing 20 freestanding public toilets on city streets.
this is new york, what are we going to do with "aesthetic order"?

Cemusa would install the amenities without charge, and pay a fee, in exchange for the city's permission to sell advertising on the toilets, bus shelters and newsstands.
there's the rub. however, i'd take the amount of advertising in the tube and have them in the subway if we could get the stations 1/2 as clean.

"The toilets are not new to them. They've done them. A toilet is a toilet."

Under the city's plan, the newsstands would be owned by Cemusa. Most of the existing newsstand owners would be allowed to remain, but they would not share in the advertising revenue.

here's what someone from Cemusa said: "We are excited, and we know we're going to do a good job,"
so everything should be just fine, then.

an extra shot of cuervo for the rita

rita's a 5... most people who know about this kind of stuff are saying that it can't sustain category 5 status for long. at the moment, that crazy bitch is spinning with winds around 170mph (273kmph), which i'm pretty sure would, well, blow.

here's how the government is handing things this time around:
The Air National Guard has also moved several of its aircraft to Austin from Houston as a precaution.
Wasn't GII in the ANG? let's see his ass back in a plane, i don't even care if he brings that "mission accomplished" banner with him.

In new orleans, they've decided to be a little more pro-active this time...
The mayor said Tuesday that as many as 500 buses were ready to evacuate the few thousand citizens who may remain.
apparently the busses are equiped with air con and TV's. who says you can't run frantically in style? and where the hell were these busses last time?

two category 3s did a fair amount of damage...
Longtime residents in Houston remembered the ravages of the last hurricane to strike the city, Hurricane Alicia, in August 1983. Although barely a Category 3 storm, it was responsible for six deaths and devastated the downtown skyline with 80 m.p.h. winds, shattering hundreds of windows and leaving the streets ankle-deep in glass.
Galveston was perhaps more nervous than any other city, having just marked the 105th anniversary of the great storm of 1900, which killed more than 6,000 residents and remains the deadliest natural disaster in the nation's history.
ankle-deep in glass. that's quite an image...

and where would be be without the quote from someone who puts their faith in God? what i really don't understand about this kind of talk is why no one seems to be getting pissed at God, who could have easily caused this mess.
"I'm placing my fate in God's hands,"

21 September 2005

it's just what grandaddy would have wanted

a fan made a video for "Jed's Other Poem" and you should watch it. it is the dorkiest thing i've seen in a long time, but the ending is beautiful. (via waxy)

category 5 time


where are they now? pouring the foundation for your new house

stereogum found a strange list of what some musicians are up to these days, and it's surprisingly plebeian.

pavement's bassist apparently works at manahatta, so that's probably worth knowing.

jon stewart doesn't care about the fact that the "turn it up" joke is super over

the best thing about the 21st century is that you can miss something that wasn't worth watching anyway, (i. e., the emmy's) and someone, somewhere will post something like this on the internet. (via stereogum)

the subway may suck slightly less at some point in the future

we may finally have inaccurate lcd displays a la the tube that tell us how long we ostensibly have to wait for trains to arrive. everyone knows that when it says a district line train is coming in 3 minutes, it's actually coming in 5-10, but i'm thrilled nonetheless. even if it takes something else off my list of reasons london is better than new york. (the post via gawker)

the article goes on to discuss the PA system problem, which am new york addressed today as well...pointing out that, "130 of the system's 468 stations don't have any kind of public address system at all." which is pretty pathetic if you think about it. Councilman G. Oliver Koppell (d-bx) "demanded every subway station have at least a rudimentary public address system within six months--even if it's just wiring a token clerk's microphone to speakers on the platform--to give basic information about emergencies or delays".

the am new york article really gets to the heart of the matter, though, quoting Beverly Dolinsky, exec. director of the Permanent Citizens Advisory Committee to the MTA: "Riders can endure a great deal if they have information".

mmmm. hmm. ha! huh?

today in beer.

i caught a bit of the daily show with Kurt Vonnegut the other night, does anyone else think he's starting to look a lot like Mark Twain?

set your vcr, dvr, tivo, whatever you got. extras premieres sunday on HBO. and thank you goldenfiddle for bringing it to my attention that Ricky Gervais is on the daily show tonight.

pitchfork are a bunch of idiots, they have a link to "shins recording third album with phil ek" but they forgot to write the story...but then they've linked to this existing story just a little down the page...maybe the shins will tell me themselves on sunday.

look who else is getting fucked

everybody's favorite flood plain, bangladesh!

"We have majored on Jesus, because he is the central figure in the Bible."

a shorter bible. they removed all the bullshit. it's 1/2 a page long.

'Look, there's a great story here - let's get into it and let's not get put off by the things that are going to be the sub-plot. Let's give you the big plot'

nah, no need to get caught up in sub-plots, they're superfluous anyway.

"This is a book for adults and has been written in a style to encourage readers to keep turning the pages, but without resorting to any literary gimmicks."

because shortening a 1000+ page book to make it readable in 100 minutes is in no way a literary gimmick.

do not have any kind of medical problem at trump tower. ever.

i am fortunate enough to work near Trump Tower, home of the "finest restaurants in the world", and i do, occasionally, dine there. in the food court. i was down there today with a friend and the woman beside us was coughing. a lot. i am heartless, but i'm still pretty sure nothing much was wrong with this lady. something went down the wrong pipe and she was gonna have to hack for a while. it's happened to me. no big deal, unless you're at trump tower.

firstly, it was freaking discusting, she was coughing into this towel thingy and it sounded pretty gross, gagging and gurgling and all. i felt bad for her, but had it been me, i would have removed myself from the area in which at least 20 people were in the midst of eating their lunches. but she didn't seem to mind. there were two guys trying to "help" her. one was a chef-type who kept running for fresh phlegm rags and the other a security-type who is a danger to society.

there is a rule of choking, namely, the choker is unable to breathe. it is under those
circumstances that one should administer the heimlech manouver. you should not try to administer the heimlich manouver when the choker is not choking, but has in fact, swallowed a raisin that got caught in her throat and is now merely having spasms. further, you should not aim the choker at me, for i am eating lunch and do not want to be hit with said raisin should it become dislodged from the choker's throat or lung.

regardless, the security-type, who clearly failed the Secret Service test (what a pity) and was feeling mighty important, grabs the woman, who is roughly 1/2 his size, and starts heimliching ths shit out of her. my lunchmate was facing the wrong direction, so i was giving her the play by play and we were trying out best not to giggle at the sheer incompetence being displayed in front of that horrible marble waterfall and scored by Frank Sinatra.

the victim apparently didn't know she wasn't choking, either, because she didn't yell "stop doing that you fucking moron, i'm not choking, you're going to break my ribs". she just kept coughing into her towel and gagging. she was ready for something to come out.

eventually they (at least three other blue-suited, earpiece havers had shown up by then) decided that even if the woman is choking, it's far better to smack her on the back as hard as possible rather than risk cracking her ribs. again, the woman evidently had no idea what was good for her, because she let 'em do it. "leave me the hell alone" would have been the only thing dislodged from my mouth if they'd tried that bullshit with me, but she was just freakin'. this went on for god knows how long and i began severely regretting my choice of cream of asparagus soup, which is just short of repulsive even when there's not a woman gagging and being beaten to death at the table next to you.

finally, a flock of emt's showed up and rescued her from the care of the mad bluesuits. right about the time she stopped coughing.

proof that google was really created by the ancient romans and has existed as a secret society for over 2000 years

in a fit of egotistical mania, some parmigan decided to look up his house on google earth. it found a villa under the earth...

that's it, everyone to the SkyDome

former place of refuge (sort of) houston is being evacuated by its mayor, who admits that there aren't enough public vehicles to get everyone out and is urging his city's citizens to help each other out and take extra people with them. George II decided it might be smart to make a comment on the storm before it happens and said, We hope and pray that Hurricane Rita will not be a devastating storm. But we've got to be ready for the worst.

the bbc reports: Troops and supplies are already being brought to the region to deal with the hurricane's aftermath. such a novel idea!

and just in case those who were in the shit for katrina weren't satisfied with their suffering: Several thousand Louisiana residents - who found shelter in Texas after their homes were wrecked by Hurricane Katrina - are being uprooted again and moved to Arkansas and Tennessee. i really hope someone takes these people to dollywood, after all they've been through, they need a little perking up, and she's just the person to do it.

hm, what's that word?? necrophilia? no. narcolepsy? no. nepotism!! that's it. i bet jebby gets all the national guard and bottled water he needs: Florida Governor Jeb Bush had declared a state of emergency in the state, which allows the state to oversee evacuations and call in the National Guard.

It looks similar to the sativa subspecies, but generally contains higher levels of THC.

awww, yeah.

(today's entries thus far have been brought to you by fark, "it's not news, it's fark". and by generous donations of viewers like you)

someone's high and thinks this is funny

i can very clearly imagine some guy (or girl) sitting in an office calling up all these trucks, telling them to take their ice away from the gulf coast and up to maine, hanging up and laughing hysterically for the next three or so hours.

seriously, though, it's a little weird. perhaps they want the trucks out of the way if/when rita hits the area.

monica lewinsky is cheaper than bill clinton

He said that after the promotion ends, the Clinton condoms will go on sale in southern China for 29.8 Yuan (US$3.72) for a box of 12, while the Lewinsky model will be priced at 18.8 Yuan (US$2.35) for the same quantity.

"The Clinton condom will be the top of our line," he said. "The Lewinsky condom is not quite as good."

Those crazy Chinese are gonna name condoms after America's favorite dick sucker and suckee. And here's why:

Liu said the company had chosen to use the Clinton name because consumers viewed the former president as a responsible person, who would want to stress safe sex as an effective way to prevent the spread of the HIV virus.

Someone who gets a hummer in the oval office from someone who isn't his wife whilst on the phone with various world leaders is not exactly what i'd call "responsible", but then again, I'm sure a Chinese person in China would never eat Chop Suey. Different strokes.

The company also cites the pairs' dedicat[ion] to their jobs. Right, they were both really focused on the task at hand.

Why do they leave this, the most logical reason for the branding, for the very end of the article...
Clinton has campaigned aggressively for heightened AIDS awareness in China, where the disease is spreading rapidly.

something weird is going on at Emory

it seems the student body president is trying to create a rivalry between Emory and Washington U. in St. Louis. there doesn't seem to be any particular reason why they chose Wash U., but he's declared war against the school and set up a ministry of propaganda. it's nice to see there's at least one person at Emory with some spirit, even if it's a pretty stupid idea. although i'm not sure i trust the majority of the student body at Emory to get the joke. soon they'll probably be doing the whole thing seriously and the poor student body president will wonder what the hell is going on.

20 September 2005

soon it will cross 9th street and we'll all be driven into the sea. or sunset park

i noticed a couple of days ago that Brooklyn Industries is moving in where Uprising used to be on 7th btw. 8&9th sts. Not that BI is much more gentrifying or hip than uprising, but its presence on sorta lame 7th avenue near 9th street is an omen. south slope, they're coming.

but they looked Brazillian

someone forgot to pay attention to the cctv on the tubes...

the night that the lights went out in georgia--er, New York City

since the birdies are flying south for the winter, NYC Audubon has convinced buildings to turn off their decorative lights above the 40th floor, so the tweeties don't get confused and ram into them. kinda sweet. (via g'mist)

why i like fark

someone put a bunch of speech bubbles all over the city and then went back and took pictures of what people wrote...

which reminds me, i ran into my first yellow arrow this weekend, at the Streit's matzoh factory...it was really interesting, they do a great job of explaining not only what you're looking at, but a little bit about the area as well. like how the blue fire escape across the street was painted by the people who started putting "fancy restaurants on clinton street".

*The Award of Excellence, to be given today, salutes Wal-Mart for moving the trees from a 5-acre wetland destroyed by the store and its parking lot.
*But man-made wetlands, known as mitigation, often fail.
*Wal-Mart was the only entry.

the is the most commonly used word in the english language.

The design simply represents a spinning ice-cream cone


i watched last night's Arrested Development when i got home, and i just want to say: thank fucking christ this show's back on the air. it was awesome. missed the kitchen confidential premiere and didn't dvr it, anyone see it?

i don't think Natasha Lyonne is going to be in this version

But I'm a Cheerleader on broadway. not really sure what the appeal is for a stage version of this movie, but it's better than Lennon.

someone spent money to figure this out:

The investigators have found, among other things, that men generally curse more than women, unless said women are in a sorority, and that university provosts swear more than librarians or the staff members of the university day care center.

and some of them are from my alma mater

Frans de Waal, a professor of primate behavior at Emory University in Atlanta, said that when chimpanzees were angry "they will grunt or spit or make an abrupt, upsweeping gesture that, if a human were to do it, you'd recognize it as aggressive"

is this in any way new information?

swear words are variations on the 'son of a whore' theme or refer graphically to the genitalia of the person's mother or sisters. and yet more brilliant insight.

then it collapses into a description of Tourette's patients with coprolalia.

The brain's impulse control center struggles to short-circuit the collusion between limbic system urge and neocortical craft, and it may succeed for a time.

Fuck, yeah.

today's iraq bombing

this time they got us.

the breakfast of champions

The New York Times has no business taunting me with a photo of fry up.

19 September 2005

20 minutes to kill

gizmodo finds a keychain which in turn finds wifi. it's actually reasonably priced, too.

sorry kids, but todd oldham gave this tip many moons ago on House of Style. many moons.

but if i didn't procrastinate, none of this other stuff would ever get done. a to not do list. (both via lifehacker)

you are warming weather

Sometimes you go see a band that you like and you leave the show wondering if you’ll ever be able to listen to their albums again. I have to give Say Hi To Your Mom a little credit, because Ace of Clubs has some really shitty sound. But I was not exactly blown away by their performance. However, it turned out to be worth it in the end because it was there that I heard about a mythical performance at a bbq in wburg by none other than John Vanderslice. I have been sucking on the Pixel Revolt crack pipe ever since it arrived from deep discount.

Anyway, we left Ace of Clubs and figured we might as well head over to
Mercury Lounge and see what the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah situation was…there was a huge line. But, it was pretty early so we decided to wait and see what happens. It was a vaguely entertaining wait, highlighted by some schmuck from Pitchfork screaming down his phone about how he's not on the list, and "I'm from PITCHFORK MEDIA", then finally getting the person he needed, actually saying, "ladies! come with me" only to return with said ladies 45 seconds later and explain that he's not the hot shot he thought he was, and James Iha. Cut to 2.5 hours later. I am whining up a storm, because I am tired of standing and CYHSY have already started. But we are at the front of the line. If two more people leave, we can go in. We manage to get inside in the middle of their third song. Certainly worth the wait, but the crowd didn’t seem to have much energy. Ambulance, Ltd. came on later and we stuck around for it. I’m not totally sold on these guys, they seem to really want to be the Rolling Stones. The bassist makes a good face, though, he looks like he’s gargling. Anyway, they totally won me over with a spot on, super loud rendition of Neil Young’s “Everybody Knows this Is Nowhere” (la, la, la, lala laaa laaaa).

The next day I brunched at
Schiller’s Liquor Bar for the first, but certainly not the last, time. Although I discovered that I do not like Welsh Rarebit, those dudes make a wicked good cuppa. And the space is the kind of place you want to sit in for about 4 hours or so and just zone out. I love zoning out.

We walked up to the High Line block party, which was pretty OK. They were out of t-shirts, so I didn’t give them any money. But we got free Smart Water (although I had to listen to 5 minutes of drivel about why smart water is so much better than toilet water), and Izzes (clementine flavor!!), so that was cool. I walked over to Union Square and hopped on to the L.

It is a testament to how much I Love John Vanderslice that I went not one, not two, but three stops into Williamsburg to see him. He was literally playing in someone’s backyard. I got there just as Eric was finishing up his last song, and JV came on about 15 minutes later. We were both wearing ringers!

He played a great deal of
Pixel Revolt and finished with an audience participation version of Time Travel Is Lonely. I really wasn’t sure how everything would translate to just JV and an acoustic guitar -- I have never worried so frivolously. I had shivers up my spine and my skin felt electrified through most of the show. Standouts (although everything was great) were “Dear Sarah Shu” (which may be the best song ever) and “trance manual”. JV was very entertaining between songs, as well. There was some discussion of a moth flying into a friend’s mouth and the friend’s lack of willingness to admit something had actually happened. Apparently he just swallowed it and kept on singing. It reminded me of the Radiohead show in Montreal last year--no, shit, that was two years ago--when Thom was surrounded by flies and moths because of the lights and he said there were flies all in his teeth. JV urged us to buy Pixel Revolt from him because he was tired of carrying them around, I almost bought another one to help the brother out. He showed us his new tuner, and promised us all that the party would not stop when he finished playing. No, there would be a dance party. A dance party with R. Kelly. Anyway, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say it was perfect. I was standing about 20 feet away and all the people in front of me were sitting, so I had an unadulterated view, and the weather was beautiful.

I took the G train home and was lucky enough to witness the following:
As we arrive at smith/9th, a couple (teenagers?) were playing in the last carriage. He was outside the door, she was still on the train. She was shrieking and laughing and he was confused. Eventually, they closed all the doors, which she seemed to know was coming. But then as the conductor started walking the length of the train to look for people, she started frantically banging on the door. When he reached her, he went on a rampage: “What the hell you doing playing around? You’re going to Church Avenue.” He was very unhappy, and I was kind of pleased to see this chick get hers, she was clearly a pain in the ass. Then he turns to the boyfriend and says something to him about why the hell is she still on the train and then asks, earnestly, “Is she retarded? Is she? Is. She. Retarded?” It was brilliant. Finally, he let her out and she (proving that something is definitely off somewhere) starts accusing her boyfriend of pushing her into the train, which he clearly had not done. So that was amusing.

With barely any energy left, I hauled my ass back into the city later that night for
Walking Concert, who put on a pretty lively show. I feel sorry for any band I see right after I’ve just seen JV rock the backyard. It’s unfair, but true.